I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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