Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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