well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
