i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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