When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
