if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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