I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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