Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
