I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
