Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
