I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
