is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize