Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize