I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
where are my eyebrows?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
