they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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