I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
