I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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