Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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