Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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