when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
