Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize