Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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