Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
