Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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