He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
