carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Randomize
