1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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