hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
