i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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