I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
