There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
