the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
