I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
