You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
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