is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
