it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
