oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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