summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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