Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
