ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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