Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I'm both gender and math confused
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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