you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Randomize
