I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
My boob is missing a layer of skin
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Randomize
