Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize