Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
