White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
