Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
