i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
