who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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