your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
